Tuesday, April 26, 2011

TOO COOL for SCHOOL

Or at least he thinks so.....

Trenton was making such good strides! I guess that is why I haven't blogged in forever. But we hit a rough patch, a bad one. I feel like our family is so fractured right now and while we may look happy on the outside we are definitely hurting on the inside. And...just for the record, I feel we get many looks and stares because I know people think we are too hard on him. The fact is, we aren't even as strict as many of the books say we should be. Maybe that is the problem, I am just not sure. For right now though if you had to pick the one issue that is the biggest and main area of concern-it's SCHOOL!

School is a train wreck and that is putting it nicely. The school system is failing him....literally. He's failing-three classes to be exact. He has been "refusing" to do his work and when they put it on his desk or he is given an assignment to complete he just simply doesn't do it. When asked why, he says because he "doesn't want to" and "doesn't like his teacher". Even though we explained to him that in life there are many things we have to do, that we don't want to, but we do anyway...he doesn't get it. Not sure I expected my almost 11 year old to understand but I gave it the old college try. Anyway, due to this he gets zeros and zeros cause his grades to drop. I have tried to motivate him and encourage him to do well-even provide him with rewards. He just doesn't want too....and nobody can make him.

Did I mention the school doesn't help. They allow him to sit and do nothing and it's not like I expect them to "make" him do it. However, I do expect that they will motivate, use motivational methods, modify, adapt, etc. I am not sure what a behavior plan is because he has one and well... I don't think it is working (or being implemented)! He has a first year teacher and a special education teacher who doesn't support her. It's quite sad to be honest with you...really. He comes home with his homework written in his planner but he doesn't have the supplies in his book bag. What happened to checking his book bag?? Why won't they send home his assignments to us (aka: the parents) weekly so we can ensure that the work is here-even if they are too lazy to do their jobs and check his book bag daily. Did I mention that he has a teacher assistant for 30 min daily to help provide behavioral support? I wonder what she is doing to help?? I won't tell you what my son (who is old enough to tell me what she is doing) says she is doing during her time in the classroom.

I am not giving up, I won't. Mom's don't give up on their children. I may be tired, emotionally drained and well spent...but I won't give up. I will fight, I will encourage, I will put a smile on my face and I will continue to seek help. But I won't give up.

4 comments:

  1. Jill, I applaud your determination and unconditional love. You my dear are a role model for mothers! I will be praying for each of you. I'm also going to tell Sarah to check out your blog. She is familiar w/ Trent's diagnosis. She has her master's in family therapy and goes into the school setting for some of her clients. Perhaps she will have some insight for you. Our love to all of you. Aunt Cheryl

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  2. Stay strong sissy poo!! Money etc aside, should he be attending any sort of special school or is it just the public school in general that is not supportive? miss you and love you lots!

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  3. love you jilli! i'm thinking and praying for you guys. you are the most amazing mother! xoxo

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  4. I am so sorry that all of you are going through this. My daughter is bipolar. We went through some similar situations.
    We saw Dr. Rosenblatt, at Graydon Manor, as an outpatient. She saved Sarah's life, and her grades.
    Don't know if you are in the Leesburg area, but a good psychiatrist can really help, and help you navigate the school and special ed system.

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